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failsafe

4/1/2024

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In that remote outpost
past Jupiter
the astronaut used broken binoculars
to see her "team"
depart without her

She sighed
and looked at the scrapbooks
she had pre-filled
with photos
of things that would never happen

And the fire she tried to light
didn't ignite
because the pod
was designed
to prevent
that type of destruction

So the oxygen
was used to keep her alive
for 50 more years
reviewing the path
of the ship
that left with her empty seat
filled with paperwork
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collections

4/1/2024

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On inspection day
the analysts asked her
Why
She had a closet full
Of matches
"I collect them"
she said
through tears

This appeased them
As the right answer
So they left
To ask the person
In the next cubicle
About her
glass elephants
and swizzle sticks
and the flask of vodka
under her desk
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puppets

4/1/2024

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You had trunks
and trunks
of puppets -
wood
and felt
and plastic
and foam
and rubber

I asked if you were
a ventriloquist
but you angrily told me
you weren't

As you pulled out
your latest creation
I noticed it had a
smashed in head
and a missing foot

It blinked at me
as if to tell me to run;
I nodded
while bending down
to tie my shoes
looking at the locked door

He's a gem, the puppet said
while shaking its head at me

You smiled
and looked out upon
your other cases
full of controlled adoration
and took a hammer
to the puppet's head
once more
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routines

4/1/2024

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At the Dollar Store
I got a new shower curtain
to replace the one
that was getting moldy
which was weird
because
it was brand new
just last week

I'm in this store a lot,
thinking about how to replace things
that were momentarily useful;
Like your chewed up toothbrush
that dripped a puddle of scum
on my counter
or your charcoal soap
that I couldn't
stand the smell of

Through the old opaque curtain
I tried to pretend
there was a clear delineation
of where I started fresh
and your shit ended
but it became difficult
through the steam
obscuring my view

No matter how hard I scrubbed
I forced myself
to hear the metal ball bearings
on the rings scrape above me
as I pulled back the plastic facade
to join the dirty world again
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tumbleweed

4/1/2024

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Long blades
Swirling in loping circles
Undeterred

Come alive
Without water
To stop the commotion
of standing still

Pointless
In a barren landscape
Oddity
Among the fecundity
With photos
To commemorate
How quaint
a rolling ball of death
seemed

A boy took aim at the tumbleweed
with his slingshot
but his mother hurried him
onward
to pick out a suit that
he would outgrow within a year

Rolling past
the barrier of entrance
with no memory
of where it came from
or how to stop it
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fieldwork

4/1/2024

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I ran ahead of you
to try to be
the person you were
running to
instead of the one
you were
fleeing

But I was on a treadmill
in my basement
standing still
watching you through a screen

The more you sweat
the deeper your hallucinations
haunted you

The sun became the moon,
the dark became the light
and you had a seizure
refusing to see a doctor
who might know more than you

So I watched, frozen,
trying to catch my breath
holding a torch
as the night fell
waiting to see
if your disintegration
would yield
the skeleton
of a man
or a beast
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back to the lab

4/1/2024

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Back to the lab
again
with broken test tubes
and compromised samples
but no matter
since data can be fudged
or ignored
altogether

A bag of marbles
displacing water
so that a centimeter
would submerge
anyone trying to breathe

My lab coat didn't fit
anymore
so I took it off
and just observed
all the suffering
in cages I locked
with animals
I was once kind to

Before the
fluorescent lights
stopped me
from seeing them
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